How do you die well? I mean, when its my time to die, how am I going to let everyone know (If I have the option of course). Will I just slowly slip away, or will I be open about it and bring my family into the process with me? I think it's an important question, as dying can be one of the most impacting things we will do. Impacting in that those left behind will remember vividly the moment, be it good or bad.
One of my two grandma's died last week. I found out just before taking off on my run. Dad left a message telling me she died the night before. There was no funeral, just a family get together to remember her life. I was not surprised by the news.
About a month ago, grandma was told she would be dying soon by her doctor. She had a tumor that was quite large and would not be removed (would cause more harm than good). Grandma wanted to see the whole family one last time before she died, so my parents (whom she was living with) called everyone and asked them to assemble. I think everyone came gladly, unfortunately, we need an excuse to all get together, and this was a good one. It was a great time together, grandma was really excited to have everyone there, just for her, and you would never have known that her days were literally numbered. She was happy, laughing, talking nonstop and really "alive". That is how I will remember her, in the middle of a lively conversation, in the center of her family.
The same group assembled yesterday, to just be together and remember grandma's life. There were a few tears, mostly laughter as we recounted story after story from grandma's life, and our own. We found that a story about grandma (from the past) would inevitably be linked to a story about another life (in the present). We were of course sad that her physical body was not there with us, but happy in the fact that we had known her, loved her, and been touched by her life.
As she had lived in community with us, so had she died, and provided a example for the rest of us to follow when our time comes.
So, although I'm still not sure how I will handle the transition of this life to the next, I do have one more example of how to die well. I'm sure it will affect my final actions, and the way I interact with those around me when I die - Thanks Grandma.
One of my two grandma's died last week. I found out just before taking off on my run. Dad left a message telling me she died the night before. There was no funeral, just a family get together to remember her life. I was not surprised by the news.
About a month ago, grandma was told she would be dying soon by her doctor. She had a tumor that was quite large and would not be removed (would cause more harm than good). Grandma wanted to see the whole family one last time before she died, so my parents (whom she was living with) called everyone and asked them to assemble. I think everyone came gladly, unfortunately, we need an excuse to all get together, and this was a good one. It was a great time together, grandma was really excited to have everyone there, just for her, and you would never have known that her days were literally numbered. She was happy, laughing, talking nonstop and really "alive". That is how I will remember her, in the middle of a lively conversation, in the center of her family.
The same group assembled yesterday, to just be together and remember grandma's life. There were a few tears, mostly laughter as we recounted story after story from grandma's life, and our own. We found that a story about grandma (from the past) would inevitably be linked to a story about another life (in the present). We were of course sad that her physical body was not there with us, but happy in the fact that we had known her, loved her, and been touched by her life.
As she had lived in community with us, so had she died, and provided a example for the rest of us to follow when our time comes.
So, although I'm still not sure how I will handle the transition of this life to the next, I do have one more example of how to die well. I'm sure it will affect my final actions, and the way I interact with those around me when I die - Thanks Grandma.
No comments:
Post a Comment